Older, but none the wiser

I remembered almost exactly what happened on my 6th birthday... I had just returned from my music lesson, and as my dad pulled up the car into my driveway, I realised that my whole house was pitch-black. Being 6 and obviously not very bright, I didn't think much into it, maybe no one was at home. As I stepped up to the door, suddenly, I felt my eyes being covered by a piece of cloth, and I was led into my house. Surprisingly, I didn't feel scared (maybe cos' I was at home) even though I couldn't see anything and the house was dead quiet. Suddenly, the blindfold was pulled off my face and I was staring at a beautiful Barbie doll cake with 6 candles and the words "Happy Birthday Jean" sprawled across it.. I was so happy that I didn't even realise when everyone shouted surprise and sang me a birthday song as the lights came on. My family had thrown me a huge party!!!

Looking back, I am amazed by how much things have changed over the years.. I remember looking forward to my birthday every single year - mainly cos' that would mean a party, lots of presents, good food and lots of fun with my friends! As a kid, it was always fun, cos' all I had to do was play with friends and just happily receive the presents... I even got away with a little mischief once in awhile! As a teenager, having a big party was 'uncool' and it was much cooler to go hang out with friends at Subang Parade or Sunway Pyramid. And though there were much less presents (cos' all your friends would pull their money together and buy a big and better present), I'd still look forward to all the fun and surprise..

But somehow, as the years have gone by, birthdays became of less importance.. it started to mellow down, the presents got less and sometimes, there wasn't even a birthday cake. But I guess that didn't really matter cos' we were all grown up and your birthday was just another day. Personally, as I have grown older and older, I tend to dread my birthday.. I will always freak out about a month before my birthday and count the seconds as I waited helplessly for life (and not long afterwards, death) to claim me..

Today I celebrate my twenty-_____ birthday.. It's a great occassion to have fun and go out but I can't help but be reminded of how little I've achieved in these twenty ____ years. Mozart had composed his first piece at the age of 6, Jodie Foster was 8 when she first appeared in a movie, our very own Nicol David was declared World Junior Champion in squash when she was 15/16, Einstein first published his acclaimed theory of relativity when he was 26 (you get where I'm going with this) and what have I done?? Nothing. Nothing of extreme importance, nothing special to note, nothing. (I haven't even appeared on the cover of Forbes as the youngest woman to become a millionaire or something like that!)

Ah well, what can I say? Growing old is bad enough, but growing old with nothing much attributable to your name, well, that sucks.. Never mind, I've given up hope of ever achieving much in my life, especially in the career path that I have chosen (or rather, chosen me..) so instead of doing something about it, I'm just going to sit back and whine.. hehe..

Having said that, all is not lost.. I still had a great time with my friends this week.. I went out with my housemates and some good friends on Wednesday for a good dinner in Mandarin. It was a birthday cum CNY dinner and the food was goooood! :) It certainly was quite fun!

Yes, dinner at Mandarin every year!

With S, DC, KMD and N

With IL and HP

We also went out last night for dinner at Hard Rock Cafe.. yeah, it's been awhile since I've been there and I was kinda craving the good food.. hehe... It's been such a long time since we had like a proper gathering of all of us so it was definitely good to have dinner together... :)

Big reunion in Nottingham!

With JW and CK

SY and JT

With S and MN

All in all, my initially-planned quiet birthday wasn't that quiet after all... but it certainly wasn't as crazy/noisy as it had been for the past few years, guess it's the effect of growing old! I'm having a sore throat now, have been on the phone non-stop since last night.. Thanks VL for calling from Dublin and chatting for such a long time! Thanks KC for waking me up to your lovely low and sexy voice all the way from across the world! Thanks to all my good friends here in the UK who were sweet enough to remember my birthday and send me cards/sms/msn or called me! You know who you are!! And of course, thanks to my dear WS for being such a sweetie!!!

Thank you once again to everyone who's been so great this time round.. Really appreciate it!! Hugs and kisses to you all...